What do you expect?

What do you expect? From friends, family, the government, the world, God? Should we expect anything at all? Are we owed something? Is what we do and how we conduct our lives reason to have the expectation of getting something in return? What do others expect from us? Do I expect to get any answers to all these questions? That I can answer. No I don't. But part of being a thinking feeling person is asking questions that have no clear cut answers. But it is always interesting to discuss and even argue about these questions.
I have been hearing a lot lately about how I should have no expectations in my relationship with my family, friends, strangers, God. Ok this is what I don't get. If you have no expectations then how do we feel, how do we love, how are we a caring friend? It seems to me that expectation is tied up with our feelings toward everyone. With no expectations there is only logic and thought. That sounds good, we have found a way to insulate ourselves against hurt and disappointments. But without the need to hear a loved ones voice at a critical time. or see a friend when we need that closeness and confidant, we become closed off and distant. We have some expectation that people will be there for us at least some of the time. For example, I have a friend, but what kind of friend always puts you off and never has time to meet. I expect something from all my friends, that is to at least try to maintain the connection, otherwise why be friends.
Maybe we have no expectations for people or events in our life that we really don't care that much about. That is easy. What's difficult is having little or no expectations for someone you care about. It hurts when they don't meet your expectations. After a relationship, either friend or more, is established there are mutual expectations, and that is what makes a relationship strong. When two people share common expectations the relationship progresses from you or me to the most prized aspect of human interaction, "we". At that point the expectations evolve into "it just happens". Effortless and beautiful.
Sometimes a relationship will devolve into too many unreasonable expectations. Its a shame. Even loving relationships can suffer that fate. Then it's up to those involved to re-evaluate those expectations and try to replace those that don't work with new ones that can rekindle the "we".
So what have I learned so far in this emotional journey through life? I am trying to see things from another's point of view, people can't always be there when I want and do and behave as I want. Maybe I should lower my expectations to coincide with reality. I think I would be happier doing so. Ill try. And that is a positive step forward.